Smut And Steff: January 2009

it seems i've always got something on the tip of my tongue.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

THIS BLOG
HAS MOVED TO WORDPRESS.

GO TO SMUTANDSTEFF.COM
FOR THE NEW HOME!

Hi. I'm Steff. I'll be your pilot.
I live in Vancouver.
Another feisty Canadian girl.
I ride a scooter, work in TV,
and have fantasies
of controlling the universe.
Welcome to the world my way.

Got a question,
or just a burning need
to contact me?
Click here.

A note about this blog:

For the first year and a half,
this blog was published as
"The Cunting Linguist."
Smut and Steff has all that
great Cunting flavour,
and all its good posts,
but none of the comments.
Be assured:
Regardless how old the post,
I'll see your comments,
and will appreciate receiving them.
Love the comments!

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER
SUBSCRIBE TO MY FEED

the best of steff

for every body

Getting Laid/Getting Tested/
Getting AIDS

Play the Waiting Game Better

Kissing: Oh, So Telling

Sexual Positioning: Link

A Case for More Communication

The Importance of Talk

Videotaping Sex: A Twist

A Game for New (& Old) Lovers

The Fuckable Friend

Stuck In Single: Weekend Bluez?

Kiss Me, You Fool: Some Tips

Stress and Relationships

You Asked? My Take on Tit-Fucking

You Asked? My Take on Cheating?

Post-Coital Bliss: The PCBs, Baby

Bondage for Beginners: Pt. 1

Bondage for Beginners: Pt. 2

Super Steff Pseudo-Single on Friday

Great Divide: Relationships Falter

Lemme off! The Relationship Ride

Masturbation: Rape Fantasies

Fine Art of Massage

To Speak or Not to Speak

Lazy Days of Lovin: Tip 1

Seducing a Same-Sex Friend?

Reader: What's Promiscuity?

Jungle Fevah

Bogey: Sexy Quantified

Advice for Young Lovers

Reader Asks: Where are Manners?

Modern Man/Woman & Etiquette

Restaurant Etiquette: Pt. 1

Restaurant Etiquette: Pt. 2

You Say Pain, They Say Play

You Asked: My Thoughts on Cuckolding

Beginners Fun with Role Play

How Much Trouble is One Guy Worth?

Say Something, Dammit

Thoughts on Stairwells and Obstacles

Whip Me, Beat Me, But Don't Judge Me

Pop Psychology: The Little Things

Reader Says: My Sex Drive's Outta Gear

Reader: My G/f Won't Fuck Me Anymore

Reader & The Case
of the Disappearing Ass

Beauty Worth Dying For?
Anorexia in Fashion

Reader:
My Man Can't Blow His Load

Got Drunk,
Wrote 'Bout The English Patient

Slowin' Down Seasonal Life

Seizing My Moment In Time

Dating Guide? SNICKER.

Dating Guide Pt. 1 (sigh, if i must)

Dating Guide: A Cynical Pt. 2

My POV: Dove's Real Beauty Campaign

Winter Weekends: Staying in for Sex

Waxing Philosophically on Jack Bauer

You Asked? HOW Do You Trust?

You Asked? What's MY Take on "Love"?

Matters of the Heart and "Timing"

The Last Word in Sex Guides?

Lovers of Voldaro: The 5,000 Year Embrace

Giving Great Face: The Art of "Face" Reading

Kegel Your Way to Better Orgasms!

Reader Asks: Ex Wants to Be Friends! What Now?

Reader Asks: Was I Wrong to Expect Friendship?

Of Love and Lawlessness

Getting Married? Practical Questions

the RANTS

RANT: The Cunt Gets a Megaphone

Dumbing Down the Modern Femme

Lousy Lover Syndrome

Twats'n'Knives Together @ Last

I Hear My Monthly Train A-Comin'

The Fantasy Business

Kids: Don't Have'em, Don't Want'em

RANT: The Kid & The Long Night

Happy Happy-Joy Joy [Insert Bleeding Here]

God's Asked Me to Whale On Yo Ass

On the Rag with The Goddesses

Rant: Depression Isn't an Insult

Putting My Foot Down on Dr. Scholl

Politics? You Gotta Be Kidding!

Make Me Orgasm, But We Can't Fuck

Adultery=LIFE? Un-Fucking-Believable

Some THOUGHTS Re: Us Bloggers

Show Me The Pussy!

I Hate Valentine's Day 2007

Islamic Controversy in Quebec

No Consequences for Being An Asshole

The Trouble With (Most, Not All) Girls Today

Gay is Not a Choice

on body image

Penis Englargement?

Some thoughts on self-image

The Struggle to Love Oneself

Beyond Fat Girls

Reader: But Will She Love My Penis?

for him

What Every Man Needs to Know:
Why 40% of Women Don't Masturbate

Erectile Dysfunction?

Penis Englargement?

Man's Guide: Cunnilingus, Pt. 1

Man's Guide: Cunnilingus, Pt. 2

Man's Guide: Cunnilingus, Pt. 3

Sex Tips from the show "Friends"

Why Women Fake Orgasms

How Sensitive's Too Sensitive?

Oral Etiquette, Odor, & Denied

Cock Rings?

He Asks: Why Won't She Lemme Go Down On Her?

for her

Get Yer Man Rock Hard

Fishies: Smell the Pheromones

Masturbation: 40% of Women Don't

Masturbation: Why the 40% Should

Masturbation: "LET" Us Masturbate?!

Giving Great Head Pt. 1

Giving Great Head Pt. 2

Can't Orgasm? A Tip

Vixens: Some Serious Thoughts

Vixens: Getting Started

Vixens: Seducing through Notes

Vixens: Giving Midnight Head

Vixens: Moves from The Bottom

Handjobs: The Intro

Handjobs: Things To Know, Pt. 1

Handjobs: Things To Do, Pt. 2

More Bang for Your O: A Trick!

She Asks: Help! I Can't Orgasm! What to do?

seriouser and seriouser

Remembering Ecole Polytechnique

The Passion of Artists & Lovers

Reader says: I'm Addicted to Love

The 30-Yr-Old Virgin

Ejaculation Ethics

Marriage: I Don't

Marriage: I Still Don't

Being Alone & Dealing

Rant: Sex in Politics

Lenny Bruce: Legacy of Obsenity

Only the Lonely

On Freedom and Fallacies

The Middle-Earth Blues

Reader: Broken Heart and Man

Domestic Abuse: A Serious Look

Domestic Abuse: Redux & Resources

Only the Lonely

The Pig Farmer: Trial Stage 2

You Asked: My Thoughts on Incest

not-so-seriouser

Being Good, Behaving Badly

The Guide to Turnin' 'em Off

Detour: Acquisitions in Pharmacopia

The Happy Panties

Love Will Conquer All, Baby

The All-Sex Diet

I Blame George Michael

White Power, Baby

Rant: The Kid & The Long Night

I Hear My Monthly Train A-Comin'

Finally! Armageddon! Bring it!

The UGLY Cry

Opposin' Forces? Laws of Attraction

TV Taught Me All I Need To Know

Sex Toy: The Remote Egg

Like, Oh, My God! Grey Hairs? On ME?

food, food, glorious food!

Steff's 2xChoc-Choc-Chip Banana Loaf

Minute-by-Minute: How to Do Perfect Egg Breakfast

getting to know me

RANT: The Cunt Gets a Megaphone

The Girl Inside The Steff

Fools in Love: Some Bad Date Moments

The Morning Quickie

Some Thoughts on Trust

The Mission, Should You Accept

Alone on Valentine's Night

Lightning Crashes... Or Somethin'

Coming to Terms With Depression

Citizen Steff flies again! (offsite)

A Letter to My Mother (offsite)

Invisible Scars, Alone in the Dark

Can't Escape High School

interesting "journalling" posts

Smattering of Thoughts on a Sunday

The Befuddling Adventures of a Girl Called Steff

Sam Cooke and Steff, Together At Last

Mixed Metaphors & The Letter G

e-Dating: Do I Really Want to Go There?

One Hairy Mofo of a Bike Ride

The Horrible Battle with the Moth

stories and such

Ooh... Bad-Ass

Kissy-Kissy

On the Bus: Erotic Fiction

Wishin' Otherwise

?

Steff resides
in Vancouver, Canada.

She's 34, single,
searching for something,
anything,
or maybe nothing at all.
She's a writer for hire,
and is open to your questions
and sometimes your suggestions.

recent encounters

THIS BLOGHAS MOVED TO WORDPRESS.GO TO SMUTANDSTEFF...

End of An Era or Something!

Why Sarah Palin Scares Me

A Perhaps Controversial Thought About the Birth of...

Gay Bashing in Gay-Tolerant Vancouver

Barely There? A Rare Photo of Me...Or, My Body Par...

What If Our Lives Were Movies?

Is it Possible?: Sex in the White House? Without I...

The End of An Era: Godspeed, Cool Hand Luke

Some Pre-Birthday Thoughts on a Busy Friday Morning

past encounters

July 2005

August 2005

September 2005

October 2005

November 2005

December 2005

January 2006

February 2006

March 2006

April 2006

May 2006

June 2006

July 2006

August 2006

September 2006

October 2006

November 2006

December 2006

January 2007

February 2007

March 2007

April 2007

May 2007

June 2007

July 2007

August 2007

September 2007

October 2007

November 2007

December 2007

January 2008

February 2008

March 2008

April 2008

May 2008

June 2008

July 2008

August 2008

September 2008

October 2008

January 2009

suitable distractions

My Journal Blog, The Ditch

The Happy Hedonist

Suzanne Portnoy

Finding My Voice

Tara Tainton

The Delish Cherry Bomb NYC

Figleaf's Real Adult Sex

Eros

Naked Loft Party

Reprobate in Disguise

Dark Daughta's Tenacity!

DirtyBoy's Dirty Thoughts

Goose'n'Gander

Erika Lust

The Doxy Diaries

Viviane's Sex Carnival

Easily Aroused

Rentboy Diaries

Remittance Girl

Pretty Dumb Things

The 30-Year-Old Virgin

Cube Monkey

SPONSORS:
Adult Toys at VibeReview

Steff's weight-loss journey
is in part sponsored by:

"when you're slapped,
you'll take it.
and like it."
humprey bogart as "sam spade"
in the maltese falcon
when making Peter Lorre
his bitch.