Oh, Lord, What Have I Done? Groan, Groan, and Double-Groan

Welcome to my continuing madhouse. Instead of wrapping everything up this weekend, I've pretty much undone everything with one weird decision. I'd planned to sell an antique sideboard of mine but my ad only got one response, a woman who's restoring a 100-year-old hotel wants to trade for it, and offered me several items.

Hey, I'm a romantic, all right? I love me some antiques, and while I've never had a chance to restore much, I know I have it in my bones. I mean, oiling wood? Yeah, I've got that covered, thanks. But the think about antiques is, new, you're looking at $1000 or more for anything decent. Trading for stuff that needs work? It's the price someone like me has to pay, 'cos I'd otherwise be visiting Ikea, right?

And what better way to change your domestic life than changing your furniture, huh? And, the non-packrat metholodogy is, pick something that can replace something you already own. I chose a desk from about 1900, which once had a leather top, and needs at least a weekend of restoration. My current desk is two filing cabinets (pieces of crap disappearing to the alley, where someone will adopt 'em) topped by an awesome 7' long maple top I made with my dad and will be storing.

It means working non-stop another two weekends, basically, not including the restore of the desk, or the painting I'd like to do around my place. I don't even want to think about how much it's going to suck walking all this new and old furniture up and down the four flights of stairs in my walk-up. No. I'm just going to sit here and quietly dread the hell of labour that awaits me.

Know what's awesome, though? My bedroom has always been a bedroom / office, and this will mean the end of that. This will mean I can have a relaxing, beautiful, sensual bedroom that truly is a world away from it all for little old me. I can't even begin to imagine what it'll feel like.

All this work combined -- restoring 4 pieces of furniture, painting my place, the final organizing -- will be the most massive recreating of my apartment since I moved in eight years ago. It's awesome and daunting and uncertain, but when I'm all done, it'll represent just exactly the kind of massive restructuring I'm attempting life-wide. Why not completely redo my home? Sure. And... I guarantee you, for probably less than $500 for everything I do.

I'll be documenting everything before and after the fact and will show you the mad decorating skillz I have, 'course you may interpret "mad" as insane, but hey.

So bear with your troubled scribe here. :) I'm just a wee daunted these days, but I'll be all right in a few weeks. Trying to implement change in my life in the absolute doldrums of February feels something like salmon trying to spawn in spring-rain rivers -- just ain't never gonna happen. But I'm obstinate and tough and I'm muddying through while trying to cut myself slack.